Excerpt from my upcoming book “The Honest Alien”
My name is Honest Al and I am an Honest Alien . . . not to be confused with undocumented aliens, dreamers, legal ethics or military intelligence which are all very confusing and contradictory concepts.
I am from the Planet TrollShill, My Planet is the original member of the TrollShillian Collective and is in the Andromeda Galaxy. My galaxy is 2,538,000 light years from Earth. I have been here for 2 billion years. An interesting factoid, It took 3,000,000 years for me to get here.
I am a low level civil servant and in my mid career. I have been waiting for promotion or relocation (rotation) for the last 200 million years and I am presently 10 million years behind on my pay raise.
As you can imagine I am rather frustrated and bored with this assignment.
Also, TrollShillians are not creative at all! We take others’ creations and call them our own!
Because of this fact, I am blowing the whistle on this whole operation! So to get things started here are a few things you can chew on!
Wars, catastrophes, disease, money, politics and organized religion are just tools to keep humans upset, desperate and energized. By keeping you constantly in turmoil we make you more creative. We thereby maximize creativity in the shortest time possible, it is fun for us, not so much for you.
The true age of the Universe is around 13 Trillion years as far as we know, but since no one is still alive from that era who the Hell really knows or even cares for that matter.
The important thing; however, is Sentient life first arrived on Earth two Billion years ago . . . If you remember that is when I arrived . . . not a coincidence.
Before me there were only automated drones and Satellites sent to survey and evaluate the potential for advanced sentient life forms . . . which is somewhat of a contradiction . . . because sentient and advanced don’t always equate.
We did service these surveilling machines from our observation post in your solar system from a planet between Mars and Jupiter which is no longer there. Big foul up that one.